The Dead Man's Chair

The chair they had planned for me was reconditioned.  Once I’d agreed that this was the type of chair I wanted they got it out of storage and arranged for it to be serviced.  This took some time.  In the meantime I was using the sample chair.  This chair I’d been told was old and decrepit had been damaged in a flood and was to be decommissioned once I’d finished with it.  Even with all this it went like a dream.  It was smooth, fast and after using it for 8 weeks I knew how it felt to use it.  I knew what I could expect from the chair.

When mine arrived it was nothing like the chair I’d been using.  I didn’t know why.  I was told they were the same chair.  They looked like the same chair.  They had the same model name emblazoned across the back.  But it was off, it didn’t go as smooth or as fast.  It made odd noises.  I kept going on about it.  Finally they looked at it and agreed that the springs needed adjusting as the person who’d used it before me had had both his legs amputated and the spring system had had to be adjusted for him.  Now it was being corrected.  But once this was done it still didn’t feel right.  When I’d turn corners it would make strange crunching noises.  People looked at it but never found anything wrong. 

I’d tell them there was something still not right but be told that this chair was just a short term chair, to get me home, to try it out in my environment to ensure that this was defiantly the type that suited me before they went ahead and ordered a brand new one. 

I gave up commenting on the issues I was experiencing.  I’d just refer to it as the dead man’s chair when unhappy with its performance.

I left hospital in July and was told that they’d look to order the new chair in October.  Between that time I had the engineers out at least three times.

In November I’d still not heard anything from the OTs about ordering a new chair.  The engineers had been out and tinkered again with it.  I was experiencing issues with the left rear wheel, it would just stick and as the rear wheels control the direction this was an issue. 

At the end of November I was going out for a friend’s birthday dinner.  On my way there I could feel that the chair wasn’t reacting as it should but, I continued on.  Luckily I got to just outside the restaurant, could see my friends through the window, before the dead man’s chair died itself.  They had to push me into the restaurant.  They had to push me home. 

The engineers told me that the left motor was completely corroded that they didn’t know how it had managed to go for as long as it did.

They had to order a new motor, which meant another week in bed without my chair.  I chased the new chair got a date for when they’d come out and complete an order form.

The dead man’s chair had been resurrected and I had it back, but again it didn’t feel right, but by this point I was thinking it was just me being prejudiced.  After a while again I couldn’t move the left hand side of the chair and it was making a really awful clacking noise.  I called the engineers again only for them to take it away for a few days and come back and tell me that they have to order another new motor as the one they got is faulty but that in the meantime this current motor should do, but be noisy.

I’m still waiting on the new motor.  It must be four weeks and in that time the chair has gotten worse and worse.  Sometimes it’s fine.  There’s no issue, then other times it’s not.  I usually find when I’m pottering about the flat it’s at its worst.  It doesn’t seem to like to stop and start in short movements. 

Last night it took me ten minutes to get from my living room to my bedroom.  I don’t live in a big flat.  I called the engineers this morning.  I’m still waiting to hear from them, but in the meantime the chair has been working like a dream all morning.